I’ve occasionally wondered what else is needed to be happier in life. It could be more money, a new car, girls, new clothes etc. there’s an issue with that, because what happens once those things are received? Eventually the novelty wears off and you’re back where you started, wanting something new. I’ve learnt that happiness does not come from materialistic things such as money and cars, it comes from yourself. On a bad day I make myself happier by simply looking around at what I’m fortunate enough to have and I show gratitude for it, this helps me appreciate the little things in life and they are certainly important. Once I’ve done this I come to the realization that ill be happy regardless of my environment, I’m alive and that’s more than enough to be happy about. I’m happy to breathe, to walk, and to love. Another source of happiness is the people around you, you can choose who is and isn’t in your life, and the people that are there are there for a reason. I’ve seen people complain about their good friends and talk about how much unhappiness they bring, and my question would be why? Why would you want that someone in your life to take away your happiness? Most don’t know the answer, and most don’t know they have the choice. If one focuses on what they want in life on a big scale, whatever it may be, that life will begin to take shape. Say someone wants to simply live a happy life, they eventually get the house they want, the family they desired etc, but they are unhappy because the people in their life are taking away their happiness. This is where understanding that a person, a friend or even a best friend will enter and leave your life as it is needed is important. People will try to hold on to the relationships that no longer serve them purpose and it causes great pain. One must accept that once you have you mind set on the direction you want to go, changes will occur and you may or may not like them but the key is to go with the flow. Embrace change and learn what you can from it, learn what you can from your relationships because a friend one day may be a distant thought the next. I’m sure if you think back on your life and to a significant change you wanted to make, you will notice that a lot more of your environment changed to suit your intent.
There is another source of happiness, and that would be love. Love is on many scales ranging from love for your fellow humans to love for your family and soulmate(s). This is tricky because I’ve found that love can remove your happiness with a vengeance, possibly changing qualities of yourself that you once cherished. There is a saying, “what goes around comes around” hold this statement close to your heart because it can never be more true. Lets say we all have that one person in our lives that has only ever put us down or made us feel bad, made us feel worthless and dumb, not worthy of their affection. And we have no choice but to love this person, on the outside we hate them and may want nothing to with them but deep down there is that love, and it drains your happiness. There are terms for people like this but that is unrelated, now think back to what I said earlier about people being in our lives for a reason, more often than not this one person we love we also hate. That’s because they emit their negativity and we have nothing to do about it, so a choice would be to run away from that person, avoid them, etc. this works in not being affected, but it still drains happiness because its one person that could bring you massive amounts of love. So here is the challenge, we cannot remove this person from our life because they are there to challenge us, we can lose the challenge on a daily basis by giving back the negativity they give by calling them names, or putting them down etc or you can win the challenge by simply disregarding the negativity and loving and accepting the person for who they are. It sounds simple enough but I assure you it may be the most difficult thing you could do, for learning to love something you hate requires you to first love yourself, all negativity and judgements we see in others we subconsciously see in ourselves. If you notice someone as being insecure, ugly, etc, the chances are you have those same feelings about yourself to an extent. So what do you do about it? Love others for all that they are even if they are the most disrespectful human alive, and that same love will be returned to you. What goes around comes around. Practice loving who you are and those around you and sure enough that love will be received, and love equals happiness.
I can tell from personal experience that accepting who you really are and loving it is one of the most important things someone can do. It’s very difficult to do but the biggest thing is fear, DO NOT be afraid of who you really are! Understand that once you become you, the people that don’t like it are not meant to be your friends, this process makes room for the friends that matter, the friends that bring happiness. I wouldn’t change a single thing about myself because I am happy with how i act and who I am. I’ve began to notice that once I was able to really love myself I was able to show love to those I cared about, even that person that is seemingly there only to antagonize, and that person left my life and was replaced by the same person, only I no longer saw that person as an antagonist, simply a caring figure that only wants the best for me. I am swimming in happiness simply because I’m alive and with being alive comes the people around you, the experiences you have, and the life you love. And what’s at the source of all of that? Love. So if you need to find your happiness, and just look for it in the right places.